what’s it really like for our waiting family?


Yesterday Ashleigh wrote a great post on what’s it really like for their family as an adoptive family. It made me start thinking about what is it really like for families that are waiting to bring home their little ones.

I get the questions, “Any adoption update?” or “How can you guys handle not knowing when the girls will come home?” ALL. OF. THE. TIME.

And I totally get it too. There’s really not much else to ask sometimes and I have great friends and family who want to show us they care. Often, though, the questions are hard to answer day after day. Most of the time, my heart is at a place where I can handle all the questions and truly enjoy answering them.

Last week was not one of those times and I’m thankful that I didn’t run into many people or else they may have seen a weepy, exhausted waiting mom and worry that I was going crazy!

When we get the question, “How can you guys handle not knowing when you’re getting your girls?”, I’m not always sure how to answer it. It’s hard to fully elaborate on because it would take me a half hour to explain all the ways God has shown us His goodness in this wait….most people don’t have a half hour and I often don’t have the emotional capacity to dive into it so I answer, “We know that God is in control.” Which is all very true, but there’s so much more to it.

We can wait because life still goes on here and now. We have people to meet with, responsibilities to uphold, bills to pay, and a life to live.

We can wait because we know that God loves our little girls more than we could ever imagine and He is caring for them on the other side of the world.

We can handle not knowing because there is absolutely nothing I can do to make this season go by any faster even though I wish I could fly over there and demand my paperwork be approved!

We can wait because we have an amazing community of people that surround us and pray for us. Just last night we had some friends over and before they left they prayed over our adoption and prayed specifically for our girls. I was in tears hearing a friend lift up our daughters in such a heartfelt way to our Heavenly Father. (If you have the opportunity, pray for your friends who are adopting WITH them. It is so deeply encouraging)

And finally we can wait in a very practical way because we still are gathering all of the finances for our adoption to be fully funded.

What can you do if you are a friend of a waiting mommy (and daddy)? Pray with them, spend fun time with them to help them take their mind off all the things they have no control over, and be sensitive to the questions you ask (it’s a good idea to ask if it’s okay to ask about the adoption process).

What’s it really like to be a waiting mama? It’s just like normal life, except you have a gaping hole in your heart that has been taken to the other side of the world.

This is a guest post I wrote for Mercy Found Ministries. An online ministry called to encourage and come alongside families in any stage of adoption.

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